Beta Off Without It

No, I haven’t gotten into the Mists of Pandaria beta yet. I’m not holding my breath.

The Blizzard RNG Gods have deemed me unworthy. Again. Still haven’t gotten into the Diablo III beta/demo yet, either, despite the game’s delay. Just like the night I filled in for a missing healer and— after weeks of clearing Dragon Soul— not only does the crossbow drop from Zon’ozz, the random zone drop gun just happened to be in the confines of a slime in the trash before Yor’shaj. Just like last week when I saw the bow from Madness for the first time ever— in both normal and LFR— and I was healing on my paladin. My list of injustices inflicted upon me by the Blizzard RNG deities could easily cover the Earth’s equator several times over.

Well, you know what? I’ve decided that I’m better off without it. So there!

While others have been fiddling about with the beta, I’ve been keeping busy with stuff like… Um… Oh, I know! I’ve been setting up my Republic characters on SW:TOR thanks to a seven-day trial, so they’ll be ready if/when I actually get a subscription. And I’ve been having fun on my arms warrior with some of my guildmates’ new 85s. And… and… *mutters something about a job and being a parent and having a “life” and blah blah blah*

Okay, so truth be told, I’m just better at jumping feet first into games with nothing but my wits to guide me. I take things at face value and say, “That’s just how it’s supposed to be. Right?” Unless something looks blatantly wrong— like checkered boxes where certain graphics are supposed to be— a lot of things will probably go unnoticed. Of course, the other side to that mentality is that I assume if something’s in beta, then everything is either incomplete or broken. Pretty sure developers at Bioware went foggy-eyed at my post-session reports during the SW:TOR open beta because I reported almost anything and everything that seemed off.

It’s vastly entertaining to hear beta stories, too. My guildmate Emo has regaled me on bugs like flying across the room and aggro’ing a boss when the ability clearly isn’t supposed to do that. Missing graphics and cutscenes are just the beginning. Oh, and there’s also supposed to be a “cutscene” where the screen simply goes black and the words BOOM! show up before fading back to the game. While it seems like something more suited to goblins than pandas, it sounds entertaining regardless.

The point is… I haven’t even kept up on all of the various new systems implemented into Diablo III because 1) it’s constantly changing, because that’s what betas do, after all; and 2) I learn better through practice and hands-on implementation. Yes, I am that “What does this button do?” person. There’s a reason why I never considered becoming a surgeon or bomb specialist. Beta servers are amorphous and, while I stare wide-eyed at all of the shiny new things, likely to change several times a day.

It takes a different gamer mentality to successfully participate in a beta. While I’m fully capable of it, I’m sure, my allergy-ridden head just can’t keep up at the moment. Not right now, anyway. So, really, it is for the beta. (Hah, see what I did there?)

Actually, now that I think about it… It’s probably safest that I don’t touch something as unstable as a beta. I’d probably break it, likely after pushing “that button.” Forget Deathwing… I’m the flippin Cataclysm.

About Toriah the Mom

Mom, quasi-librarian, gamer, writer
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